Alex Marvel, Motivational Notes



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The answer is in your hands
by Alex Marvel

An ancient sage was known to have answers to all questions. One day a teenager, talking with a friend, said: "I think I know how to cheat the Wiseman. I'll take a bird in my hand and ask whether he is alive or dead. If he says he is alive, I will squeeze and once the bird is dead it will drop to the ground, if he says he is dead, I'll open my hand and let it fly.”
He came to the sage and posed the question: "Wiseman, the bird I have in my hand, is it alive or dead?".
The sage looked at the boy and said:
Boy, the answer lies in your hands ...

This great truth is linked to one of the least understood scenarios and the most relevant to the development of a successful life: you are responsible for your own life.
You must acknowledge and assume that everything that happens to you is your responsibility: you are the owner of the good and bad, successes and failures, joys and sorrows, of right and wrong in your life.
You are responsible now, you have been before and you will always be responsible.
This is not a theory. You are, in concrete reality, the one who creates the results of your life.  And not on occasion, but always.
If you dislike your job, you are responsible.
If your relationships are a mess, you are responsible.
If you are overweight, you are responsible.
If you do not trust the opposite sex, you are responsible.
If you are not happy, you are responsible.
You cannot escape responsibility for how and why your life is like it is.
I'll tell you why this is so important: if you do not admit this responsibility, you will misdiagnose the problems that arise, and if you misdiagnose, your performance will be wrong and if your performance is wrong ... the situation will not improve.
This is an absolute truth.
Imagine you lost your wallet, because without realizing it, you left it in the car, and then you begin an exhaustive search in your house and you are extremely careful to look in every corner of the house. A very efficient job.  But you never find it... Why?  Easy, because it isn’t there.  It is certainly a very simple example, but it happens that right there most people are trapped. When you start looking for solutions to your problems in others, you will not find them because they are within yourself.
If you convince yourself that you are a victim, there will be no progress, no cure no victory. If you do not admit this law and still perceive the external world as responsible, acting from the position of victim, you will not get to create in your life a positive and permanent change.

It may be that this seems contradictory to the traditional teachings and those that are socially acceptable, even some that are religious.  In the heart of people there is too much fatalism and conservatism, which can also be explained by religious beliefs, and all this results in lifestyles that are a far cry from a fruitful life.
On the other hand, it is easier to tell ourselves that what happens to us is because of our parents, our children, our wives, our boss.  If this is your case, you're not alone.
From the studies of human behavior that I’ve carried out, I’ve perceived that the vast majority of people blame their misfortunes on others.
I am like this because of my mother.
I am like this because of my boss.
I am like this because of my wife.
I am like this because of the religious leader.
I am like this because of the government.
I am like this because of my brother, my friend, etc.
Think of your last discussion. Who's to blame?
The problem is that blaming others is constitutive of human nature:

The man said, “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.”
Then the LORD God said to the woman, “What is this you have done?”
The woman said, “The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”
 Genesis 3:12,13 - NIV Bible.

Shunning responsibilities is mere self-preservation.
Taking charge of your responsibility is not bad news. It is actually the best thing to do, because in admitting the role that you yourself have played in the appearance of your problems and accepting your responsibility, you've also realized that all solutions are within yourself. While everyone blames others in order to avoid taking responsibility for what is wrong in their lives, you should be heading to the remedy.
Stop saying: "Why are they doing this to me?” and start saying: "Why am I doing it to myself?”
What ways of thinking, behavior and options am I going to change to get another, different result?
Given what we now know ...
I see why I'm depressed.
I see why I’m an alcoholic.
I see why I got married three times.
I see why I'm bogged down in this job.

In this way, I had programmed myself for failure.  But it's over.
Can you say with me? - I am responsible for everything that happens to me.
Come on, say it again: I am responsible for everything that happens to me.
This is true both for those who are unhappy with their environment, and for those who are satisfied with it.

Therefore, I encourage you to take the reins, to take charge, because your life depends on you, on your way of thinking.  Never forget, you are the one who rules your "ship."  It is time to remove your hands from your pockets and start to take the helm with firmness and determination, taking your life through the seas of your choice, provided your having previously sailed through your inner ocean and choosing the right thoughts in your mind and heart.


Alex Marvel has developed projects which offer resources and strategies to the player himself, so that he can benefit when it is time to practice or compete. It is a compilation of techniques and proposals on how to apply behavioral psychology in football practice, the use of cognitive psychology to enhance the mood of the player, the bases and foundations of group dynamics to improve team interaction, the importance of motivation and how to implement these techniques.



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